theVoiceofReason.com
Feb 6, 2012
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Finger Flap

For a limited time only you can enjoy your very own Super Bowl 2012 Half Time Show Tie In Flip The Finger / Finger Malfunction Ornament from theVoiceofReason.com.

Redacted Superbowl Finger

Watch version 1.0, below, and then pay your money in full and wait for just only a minimum of three miniscule weeks as we get MIA to sing the swear words for a fully authentic 2012 Super Bowl Half Time Show Tie In experience.

[More]

6 Feb
February: Leap Year 2012...
Ignoring advice from an expert will have no adverse effects for a brief window 6:36am to 8:34am on the 9th of the month. [More]
Taking tests, maybe a driving theory test, a blood pressure test, or a math test for the under 6's, are badly starred this month, especially around question 6 and 10. In multiple choice exams prefer the C above all others. [More]
It's time to motivate yourself to get a new motivational coach - the old one will appreciate you using the techniques he has taught you in the termination process in a Karate Kid comes good type way, but having billed you an hourly charge for the last 18 months, unlike Mr Miyagi. [More]
Remember that being attractive to the opposite sex is a privilege that can be taken away by the planets at any time by removing your dress sense. [More]
Misheard lyrics in songs, played on the radio, will be a constant danger this month, especially if you tend to overreact when mistakenly hearing your name while carrying fragile, valuable objects. [More]
Plans for picnics, or any predominantly bread based foods eaten on checkered cloths feasts, are well starred this month, especially from the first to third chew. [More]
If your New Year resolutions are still working for you, you have about two more weeks, max, before you throw in the towel, as a nebulous Mercury glides past the sphincter of Calelaphane sideways. [More]
Singing your national anthem has never been more bizarrely starred, especially now you have been asked to lead a crowd at some outdoors ceremony or sporting event. It's not just that you appear to be doomed to getting either the words wrong, or the tune wrong, but there's something involving an animal, maybe a mascot or some kind of flying creature keen to mete out what it considers to be a well deserved beating. [More]
You are determined to teach an old dog a new trick this month, just to prove them wrong. (You may have to compromise on making it an older trick than you had first anticipated.) [More]
Going up behind someone and putting your hands playfully over their eyes is poorly starred this month, especially if either of you are carrying a bowlful of water. [More]
For a brief moment this month you will be able to understand what a dog is saying when it is barking. Yes, exactly like in Lassie. After the typical Taurean reaction of cocooning yourself into a complete denial funk, you will soon be won over by the mutt's compelling arguments. You may even show the dog your putting a chocolate drop on your nose, flinging your head back and catching it in your mouth trick you decided to learn as your new year resolution... [More]
'A watched pot never boils' is just one of those old sayings you are determined to prove wrong again this month. [More]
February 2012
Barack Obama Sings... Real
Seriously
Sheer Hackery

Today wikipedia has gone black. Maybe you want to use today to stand behind an honorable statement and not use it. Great.

But if you've just gotta see that wikipedia page here's how to do it in Google. [More]

18 Jan
The Original, And Best, Hitler Parody - Mel Brooks
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Super Rick

We asked the remaining Republican Party presidential candidates what non copyrighted superpower they would like to have, and why.

Today's guest is Rick Perry, born James Richard "RickPerry, a former Texas tenant farmer and most remembered for not being able to remember three things at once.

Rick Perry

Mr Perry, welcome to theVoiceofReason.com...

Good afternoon to you and yours. God bless.

My copyright free super power that I would most like to have is the ability to be able to sing everything. [More]

17 Jan
Happy Birthday Muhammad Ali
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Super Mitt

We ask the Republican Party presidential candidates what non copyrighted superpower they would like to have, and why.

Today's guest is Newt Gingrich, former Speaker of the House, recently staged an impressive recovery in the polls, but will it last?

Newt Gingrich

Mr Gingrich, welcome to theVoiceofReason.com...

Thank you so much for having me! Wooo weee, let's go!

My copyright free super power that I would most like to have is the ability not to have to sleep. [More]

16 Jan
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Super Mitt

We ask the Republican Party presidential candidates what non copyrighted superpower they would like to have, and why.

Today's guest is Mitt Romney, current front runner and proud to bet $10,000 a time, multimillionaire business man...

Mitt Romney

Mr Romney, welcome to theVoiceofReason.com...

Thank you so much for having me!

I have given this considerable thought and have decided on the non copyrighted superpower of not having to eat and drink at all... (which leads on to the pleasant side effect of not having to poop or pee at all... Ha Ha!) [More]

12 Jan
Why I hate religion but love Jesus
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GOP GOB
9 Jan

Latest Funny Horoscopes for February 2012

All our stories are in our archive [here]

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