Capricorn - August 2014 - Funny Horoscope

A pan-fried meal of chicken and, the charts suggest, something green, on the 7th, is set to dominate dinner based conversation for all the wrong reasons well into the end-of-year holiday season. (Ensure that you practice your vegetable-flipping wrist technique for at least three days before hosting any exotic vegetable flipping party.)

Saturn will influence your soft-furnishing endeavours in an unexpectedly fashionable way. Favor scatter cushions in all of their forms, although avoid your initial impulse to actually scatter them haphazardly as you won't be able to open the door.

A weather forecast will cause much confusion on 18th.

 

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