Air guitar and popcorn making will be inextricably linked this month, as Neptune and Saturn wink at each other across the vast expanses of space. What this actually means in practical terms is determined by a complex matrix of factors including the weather, the price of sunflower oil and how bad the news is on television.

The joys of love are about to smack you about a bit this month in any number of ways - it may lick you on the cheek or firmly squeeze your upper arm with affection.

Tipping has rarely been better starred, both in restaurants and in the waste materials in dumps etc sense.

This month your destiny walks to the inebriated with a cursory gate.