Taurus - July 2012 - Funny Horoscope

Avoid any Get A Beach Body In 3 Weeks adverts - it's too late for that now - better to get those close to you to call you names or look with derision or disgust at you whilst wearing your new summer costumes if you really want to prepare. (Venus says get the crying over now and you will be able to enjoy your holiday much more later.)

You are about to become the advertiser's pin up for before pictures worldwide this month especially if you look like a fat version of a famous person.

Youtube lip synching to Bohemian Rhapsody, Call Me Maybe but not any Celine Dion song where you have to put your arms out wide in the air are well starred.

This month your destiny has a furrowed brow.

 

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Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19