Avoid any Get A Beach Body In 3 Weeks adverts - it's too late for that now - better to get those close to you to call you names or look with derision or disgust at you whilst wearing your new summer costumes if you really want to prepare. (Venus says get the crying over now and you will be able to enjoy your holiday much more later.)

You are about to become the advertiser's pin up for before pictures worldwide this month especially if you look like a fat version of a famous person.

Youtube lip synching to Bohemian Rhapsody, Call Me Maybe but not any Celine Dion song where you have to put your arms out wide in the air are well starred.

This month your destiny has a furrowed brow.