"Bottoms up," "Down the hatch" and "There's no use crying over spilt milk" are your liquid related lucky catchphrases for a large chunk of the month.

A phone call from an overseas salesman is about to offer you an opportunity too good to miss, if only you could place his accent.

Treat spaghetti with respect this month, but freely abuse tagliatelle for being the no good trash that it is, until supper on the 24th.

Now maybe the best time in a while to decide if you are The Hairy Lady, The Gorilla Man or The Dwarf in the circus that is your life.

This month your plan of indecision might just work.