Libra - October 2011 - Funny Horoscope

Long and short journeys are well starred, but middling journeys are badly starred this month, especially in later evening and the first and third weekend of the month. The planets are withholding details about how long a middling journey is. Err on the side of caution - two rest breaks is probably too long unless you have a urinary infection which makes you want to pee a lot.

Conferences are well starred particularly the free food you get at them, especially buffets. Even the most flatulence inducing foods will be benign as the flatulence biorhythm for Libra hits the benevolent 2-3.30 level most times this month. Don't even bother taking the indigestion tablets, says Jupiter, in one of the clearest signs from the planets this award winning horoscope website has seen in over 500 years.

Man cleavage is about to become lucky for a short period in the middle of the month, especially if ladders are involved.

Your destiny fancies a new hairstyle.

 

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Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19