Your chart is a little difficult to read this month, it looks like gay hats are well starred this month. Yes, you read that right. Gay hats. What does that mean? What is a gay hat? Is it gay in the 1950's sense, or gay as in the modern Bruno sense? Only you can decide this month as Neptune leaves you holding the baby as it is off on holidays.

Embrace growling animals no bigger than a squirrel this month, they are only playing, and the worst that can happen is a little nip and then they lock their little jaws and won't let go regardless of the amount of swinging about you to to dislodge them. Aaaah.

Put on your happy face even though you feel like an angry trout, especially on Saturdays.

Your destiny shares the dreams of the obese ballet dancer who hasn't been able to fit properly into her tutu since 1978.