Scorpio - May 2011 - Funny Horoscope

Speeches that include meaningless euphemisms, so wide generalizations they could not possibly ever be wrong, and a nice hair cut, are your preferred methods of announcing that you intend to stand for president this month.

A favorite stripy t shirt will be stained by either tomato sauce or red wine just above the left nipple area, mid month.

Your lucky swear word is still too rude to be printed in this family newspaper.

In any multiple choice exams favor A's over C's every time.

This month your destiny wears a saddle.

 

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Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
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Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19