Cancer - June 2011 - Funny Horoscope

Dressing like Lady Gaga continues to provide problems particularly with slightly infirm old people this month, especially when shopping for groceries in street markets or poorly lit shops near post offices on pension day.

Yachting, paddling boats and canoeing are poorly starred as the moon seems determined to cause problems with the tides just for Cancer. Our advice is to take someone with a different star sign with you in any boating activity until well into September.

Attempts to make a hole in the wall of a wooden buildings the same shape as the person slamming through it (like they do in cartoons) are ill starred again this month, even if the person going through the wood is protected in some sort of Iron Man type costume.

This month your destiny is pulling you in a North Westerly direction.


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Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19