Pisces - April 2011 - Funny Horoscope

A staple gun, an axe, and a chainsaw, are your lucky murderous tools of horror this month, especially in the dark moonless hours when nothing seems to stir but the hanging chair which bangs against the dilapidated shack in the middle of the woods.

A spontaneous decision to go camping is set to be quickly reversed in a bizarre coincidence involving an ice cream cone, a picture of Elvis and a lost screwdriver set.

You will be manipulated into taking a small child to watch Hop at the cinema around the start of the holidays.

A deli in New York is set to name a new sandwich after you with a surprising amount of pickles in it. What are they trying to tell you? Only Gino, the proprietor, knows.

This month your destiny shares the same planetary configuration as all the other star signs.

 

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Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19