Gemini - May 2010 - Funny Horoscope

HOROSCOPE ADVISORY: There is a stubbing your toe advisory in force now until well into July 2011.

Sunflower, peanut, but not walnut oils are your preferred frying oils this month especially when flipping the contents in the pan is required in any Jamie Oliver inspired cooking performance.

Gemini drug dealers should hide their stash particularly securely on the 18th or 28th of the month.

Large tongued Gemini dogs are erratically starred especially in any overly affectionate encounters with humans, particularly after early supper, bowl-of-water-lick, or mid evening walkies, until well into July.

This month your destiny has something to do with a vacuum cleaner, a cleaning cloth and a spray disinfectant that fizzes up when you spray it.

 

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Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19