There has been a distinct lack of flamboyance in 2008 and you should look forward to a year of over indulgence and hearty laughter where you will hold your sides for hours while you laugh mercilessly and only slightly hysterically at a glorious miscellany of targets to be provided to you by the planets.

Your plans for the new year are well laid, even though they may seem to you to be haphazardly planned or maybe even the plan of no plan. Don't worry just be happy and just suck the marrow out of the bone of life, failing that just sit in a chair quietly until it passes.

February holds out the prospects of a large windfall and by April the marvellous year you are about to enjoy will be well set in motion, with long cigarette holders and lounge coats firmly starred.

Avoid water when possible, and everything with water in it. All humans are about 90% water so take care.