Taurus - September 2009 - Funny Horoscope

Your rugged Taurean good looks and widely acknowledged effortlessness in any heroic encounters, are set to mark this month as one of mayhem set at bay. Avoid your newfound urge to fly building to building, back flips and running fast at high altitudes especially when fighting any bald or shaven headed foes. A popular cleaning product will disappoint when trying to remove a tomato ketchup stain from your cape at noon on the 17th.

Snakes and antelopes are surprising bedfellows during a surprise twist of fate on the 23rd of the month at around tea time.

Moonlit walks and kissing are well starred unless you are in Afghanistan or Iraq airspace.

Jimmy Crack Corn And I Don't Care is about to attain a mysterious new meaning involving cooked green beans.

 

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Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19