Jumping up, down and sideways with jugs filled with liquid, especially sticky sugary liquids, are hilariously badly starred this month - ensure someone is videoing you at all times. There is an evens chance you could become a YouTube sensation with a jump on or around the 5th of September.

From a video production standpoint, your stars could not be better. The planetary alignment that Aquarius basks in this month means that recording anything will go over 6% better than usual (Hitchcock never did better than 2%).

Cartoons in the newspapers may have a message around the 5th involving a dog out for a walk, or a man in a big flappy cap, or a caveman with long out of control hair, or a cat with an attitude problem. Carefully read these messages from the stars for a solution to a traffic or bathroom based melee.