Scorpio - October 2009 - Funny Horoscope

Your enduring confidence that 45rpm records will one day make a comeback will be knocked once more this month, as Saturn attempts to face slap you to your senses from afar.

Traffic cones, especially orange ones with white stripes, are badly starred especially if flying in through the air from the east. Refrain from putting your windscreen washers on during any cone based storm, a common driving error.

Distortion when you sing into a microphone in a talent competition is not being helped by a sound engineer under the influence of Jupiter who you have wronged in some way. Take this as a life lesson to get on with the little people: Remember that sometimes the planets will help you out, sometimes you deserve a kicking, sometimes you are just singing too close to the microphone.

This month your destiny has Skunk Flu.

 

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Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19