Aries - March 2009 - Funny Horoscope

All arty Aries, who still write with a feather quill, are at significant risk of running out of ink more than twice this month, ensure stocks of ink are replenished immediately because this month there is a lot of artfully inscribed penmanship ahead.

Hearty laughter and 'mini wees' are both set to be suggested to you by a life coach you have hired to help in a personal development program. The eureka type discovery of the benefit of 'mini wees' will change your life. (Yes, a 'mini wee' differs from a normal length wee in that you train your bladder to wee for just five seconds at a time. You can, of course, return to have another 'mini wee' but only after at least ten minutes - this will train you to enjoy everyday luxuries you take for granted - Might be best to keep a spare couple of pairs of underpants ready especially in the early training days of this controversial Jupiter endorsed plan.)

This month your destiny comes in the form of a cyclical downturn.

 

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Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19