Capricorn - February 2009 - Funny Horoscope

Your fiery Capricorn temper at the smallest of things is set to increasingly blight your chances to get anything done over the next few years. Count slowly 1 to 10, trying to avoid any added expletives into the count, and let your rage pass. Watch out in particular for danger that you may spark some kind of altercation involving marker pens around coffee break on the 11th.

A chance encounter with a Saturn inspired street urchin, or bum, may set you off on a path of no return. Follow him until you are under the bridge, but no further.

Half-price day-old donuts will once again provide an excuse to delay your healthy eating 'diet' ambitions. Remember, the planets are not in favour of short-term fad diets, you will have to change your eating pattern to make any difference to your weight.

Eggs, but not bacon, are well starred this month. Avoid eating the two together until the cock crows on the 24th.


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