Sagittarius - August 2009 - Funny Horoscope

A moment of temporary bewilderment will set you off on the wrong footing this month.

Beware of molluscs and micro organisms in all of their forms - they are under the influence of an aggressive Saturn and could provide danger in many different ways including mild burning sensations in parts of the body that rarely see the sun.

Waking up in the middle of the night sweating and screaming for help are so-soly starred especially if you can't remember what you were dreaming about. Think, think again. You must remember what it is... Did you dribble on the pillow? That is a very bad sign...

You like nothing better than to compare friends and family members to popular television and film characters. Your secret is about to come out. Be prepared for some aggressive cross questioning from those you have done wrong, especially the ones you have named Captain Caveman and Fred Flintstone.


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Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19