Cancer - June 2008 - Funny Horoscope

Saturn, Venus, but not Pluto, are determined to bring you down to the ground in a playful 'wrestly' type sense. Accept any mild trips, small amounts of liquid tossed at you from nearby and light to heavy slaps across your face with good grace. Remember throughout the month that violence begets more violence - become a violence sponge and the buck really will stop with you and, who knows, one day World War Three might not start because of you. Well done in advance.

Seek out problems that may be sneaking about in the background and bring them to the fore in any which way you fancy at the time, excluding grabbing them by the scruff of the neck or throwing a big punch to their face.

Dogs and cats, but not rabbits and large 'itchy' type rats, should be used in any way your machinations require regardless of any animal rights policies that you normally adhere to.


This feature is brought to you by

© 2000 onwards
Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19