Capricorn - August 2008 - Funny Horoscope

After last month's problems with pistachio nuts, the planets are concerned at your suicidally high sodium intake. If the hallucinations start drink lots of water and pray in the direction of Jupiter, which is up for about half of the time.

Police are set to raid you home or your place of work this month in a planetary inspired tip-off from a mystic or horoscope writer. (It's not me!)

This month your destiny is undecided, and may leave any outcome until next month.

 
 

This feature is brought to you by theVoiceofReason.com

© theVoiceofReason.com 2000 onwards
 
Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19