You will be feeling weepily-vulnerable at times this month, but friends will be too busy with small-to-medium life crises to truly understand your apparently unending demand for boxes of tissue and anything else with any absorbency to speak of.

Use any moment of abject terror this month as an excuse to reflect on what improvements can be made to your life.

Most American style muffins, but not blueberry ones, are well starred for mid-meal snacking purposes after the 7th.

Your TV remote will go haywire at times this month flipping three or four stations at a time. Allow those around you to change the channels and look upon them with a furrowed, matronly, eye.