Aries - August 2007 - Funny Horoscope

An at-the-time potentially dangerous snorkeling incident from times passed will come back to haunt you in a very pleasant way on the 29th, possibly in the form of a very wet lick between your toes.

Small shrubberys and bushes offering berry fruits will draw you into the outdoors after 6th, and may indirectly encourage you to start reading raunchy late 19th century fiction involving Ladies of the Manor and their hunky game keepers who chop wood with their shirts off.

This month learn a Maori Haka to scare off innocent passers by, but on no account get one of those Maori tattoos as the chances are your tattooist will be under the influence of a chirpy Mercury.

 

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Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
Apr 20 - May 19
May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
Oct 23 - Nov 21
Nov 22 - Dec 21
Dec 22 - Jan 19
Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19