Aries - October 2006 - Funny Horoscope

This month you will be driving your car on a brightly lit highway and, all of a sudden, the roadside lights will go out. You will be left at the mercy of the lights on your own car to guide you safely to your destination, in what is intended by Jupiter to be both a profoundly philosophical and completely inconvenient intervention. Folk singers will be inspired to base new albums on this blackout incident, but you will simply distrust public utilities with a new, spitty, venom.

Neptune is also plotting. You are at a 34.657% chance of electrical problems in your home as a Neptunian Moon attempts to attack you with an electrical calamity of medium potential. Go nowhere without a torch and a flask filled no higher than the maximum level of a hot beverage of your choice.

Distrust any person who shakes your hand with a view to winning your vote in any election this month.


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Other Horoscopes for this month
Mar 20 - Apr 19
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May 20 - Jun 20
Jun 21 - Jul 21
Jul 22 - Aug 22
Aug 23 - Sept 21
Sept 22 - Oct 22
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Nov 22 - Dec 21
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Jan 20 - Feb 17
Feb 18 - Mar 19