You enjoy wearing boxer shorts or, even, nothing at all under your suit, for that almost 1960's level of freedom-feeling downunder. It is important to double, triple, even quadruple check your zipper throughout the month.

Avoid old dark suits as zippers are to come under the direct influence of Mercury and could explode open on the 17th all-of-a-sudden, leaving you exposed to the dreaded consequences. Take an umbrella with you at all times to cover your embarrassment.

A dwarf-like-human wearing a Star Wars Storm Trooper uniform will break two windows in your house on the 15th - Your misguided threats of Jar Jar Binks will bring mirth to a young child's eyes.