Your uncontrollable anger and senselessly aggressive arguing has not gone unnoticed by the planets and you are soon to be approached with an offer to take this talent on to a professional stage.

This seemingly, unbelievably, ludicrously well paid new profession, should be carefully considered, although your attention is drawn to the significant amounts of small print in the contract.

Your lucky sport this month will be football (soccer) including hooliganism and especially throwing homemade missiles.

Take refuge in your gruff persona daily until 11am.