Arnold Schwarzenegger plays Douglas Quaid who is apparently a secret agent on Mars which is controlled by evil Vilas Cohaagen. OR IS HE?

Sort of like an over complicated, muscular, Truman Show with all the baddies being pleasingly shot, slapped or exploded before the closing credits.

"Interesting tangential reality shit."

"Who is the goody, who the baddy? Why does nobody wear the white and black hats these days? It's so difficult to make sense of this generation."

"I went on a holiday like that once and I got a refund after a 5 year legal suit."

"2084 AD seems very noisy to me, my dear. If I am around I hope I have lost what is left of my hearing."

"The movie is fine, but what annoyed me more than anything was the cack-handed in-film brand placement. These included Pepsi with the old white background, and Sony Trinitron. This is 2084 guys and even in 2002 the brands have changed. I want a refund."

"The lighting in this movie is very red. At first, I thought my TV had gone berzerk again but it hadn't, that's about as much as I can say about this movie - I got a good workout as I slapped the TV about."

"This is, like, all of those soap story-lines of the 1970's, about memory loss, all rolled into one honest-Joe against the evil bastards plot. Moderately good, but I would have preferred to watch Blade Runner again."

Quaid pays a company to implant his brain to make him someone else for a holiday. It goes horribly wrong, or is it a dream?

Talk of embolisms, lobotomy's and f-words fly all over the place before Quaid finally flattens everything.

He is fighting an evil conspiracy led by Cohaagen - this is completed after a number of explosions. It ends with our hero and Melinda arm in arm, kissing.

Wife: "Honey, you wouldn't shoot me would you sweetheart?"

Bang!

"Consider that a divorce."

Exceptional special effects and a very good idea for a movie, but it's a little too long and loud. The hard of hearing may particularly enjoy this movie.

In their day, the special effects were quite impressive - from a woman's head opening up like a can of peaches, to a small baby talking in the stomach of one of the actors, and Arnie pulling a glowing globule from his nose...

June 12 , 2002