Studio executives summary / pitch
|
| The
original 'Sixties in space' TV series returns with modern (1980's) space drama
look-and-feel, without the dust.
|
Short plot
summary |
|
Kirk has been
promoted to the rank of Admiral. He returns to Captain the USS Enterprise as there
is a 'thing' out there. Voyage
of discovery at the beginning of a five picture deal. Characters:
- Mr
Spock is very logical
- Mr
Bones is very testy towards Mr Spock
- Mr
Scottie is determined to continue with his Scottish accent straight from a 1930's
US movie
- Ms
Uhuru is keenly on hand to make up the numbers
- Captain
Kirk is dreamy
|
What our
panel of critics thought |
"My, this
could have been set in San Francisco and be about a killer whale and I still would
have watched it. I guess I will have to wait for the fourth in the series for
that moment of wonder. Darn it!""A
satisfying transfer from TV to the big screen. It's like a reunion of childhood
friends all in a computer game generated backdrop but without the chewing gum
on seats.""A
highly philosophical plot, not much time wasted running and zapping with their
phasers. A disappointment.""A
veritable cornucopia of logical thought with pointy ears. Don't expect Blade Runner,
but it is much better than the trash Sci-fi show of the 1960's, the colors are
much better and the special effects don't make the walls wobble. A triumph!""Captain
Kirk pulls his stomach in with gusto, although there is little need for his legendary
punchy-fists to save the day. All in all a nicely wordy piece.""The
Spock-alise: one of my earliest disappointments in childhood. It was not until
my 15th year when I realized that you couldn't make someone unconscious by just
nipping their shoulder like Mr Spock (I assumed I was doing it wrong).
I and my fellow class members would spend hours nipping each others shoulders
but with no result; indeed it seemed only to aggravate the beating we then had
to endure from those much rougher than ourselves.""Captain
Kirk was once voted the best manager of all-time by a management consultancy.
I bet if he didn't get what he wanted, he could just let that stomach out - a
submission would surely follow." |
Please
tell me the ending |
| V-ger
is the Voyager 6 space probe - it is looking for its creator as it has mutated
into an artificial intelligence type non-human-feeling-creature. Will it and Mr
Spock marry? Close, but no C-ger. To
continue on its evolution, Decker, from the Enterprise, agrees to be melded to
almost certain death off screen in a moment of human growth experimentation madness.
There must be a spin off series in this somewhere... Never fear, all the main
characters live for the sequel. |
Quotable quotes (fake) |
|
"On
the double, Decker." "Deck
her, Decker." "Decker,
don't. " "Donut,
Decker?" |
What
snack should I eat while watching this movie? |
| Any
phaser shaped chocolate bar. |
If I were
to watch this at home how best should I sit? |
| In
the 'let's go to warp speed' position - make sure you do not hold a drink when
you do this or it will be all over the sofa within seconds. |
Would your
pets like this movie? |
|
Dogs will happily
perform dog love on William Shatners leg within a moment of meeting him - he is
a God of dog owners - do not invite him around to your apartment without tying
up your mutt securely. Cats
dislike Captain Kirk, preferring Mr Scottie; cats prefer tartan. Scottish
Parrots will become visibly distressed during the movie as Scottie's accent is
not that good and were they to 'do' this accent their resale value would plummet.
|
Other comments
|
|
The special effects are a million times better in this movie than in the TV series
and at last it is no longer THE SIXTIES IN SPACE which was our objection
to the TV series. |
Date
of review |
| June
5, 2002 |