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Snatch
Studio executives summary / pitch
OK guys we got Brad Pitt, let's move.
Short plot summary

Cartoon-like characters from London underworld. Bare knuckle fighting 'pikies' (gypsies), diamond stealing thugs and pig eating corpses. A comedy from England.

Rating
18: Includes moments of English accent, the word cockney, Pitt Bull terriers, bare knuckle fighting, spitting, blood, guns and dogs swallowing squeeky toys.
What our panel of critics thought

"All the fun of a trip through the London underworld without the need to get on a plane to fist fight for real. A triumph!"

"Oh, Mr Ritchie, you can certainly produce an entertaining smorgasbord of underworldian mayhem. Bravo!"

"Another romp in the London underworld nightmare that exists to perplex the authorities who mostly run around with very tall hats on, unarmed."

"Not much running in this movie."

"A veritable treasure-trove of stuffed dogs looking up to camera. Of vicious dogs biting actors in cars and then swallowing squeaky toys to make then wheeze. Marginally not as good as Lock Stock, but it has much going for it."

"Like a cartoon but no Boing! and Kerching!! An entertaining movie with an interesting group of characters."

"A boy movie which can also be seen by girls (albeit with the necessary warnings regarding penis envy)."

"A bare knuckle fight movie, but this time played for laughs. Mr Pitt, you boxing-bouncer-slim-tattooed-bedlam-bashing boxer-type! BOO!"

Please tell me the ending or whole plot if necessary

Strand One Tommy, when going to buy a caravan for his business partner, Turkish, meets bare knuckle champion Mickey (Brad Pitt). The 'protection' sent with Tommy, Gorgeous George, is involved in a fight with Mickey. Mickey wins.

Gorgeous was to have taken part in a fight against an opponent put up by a guy called Brick Top. Turkish goes to Brick Top to tell him about George. Turkish offers a replacement (Mickey), Brick Top says he must go down in 4th round. He doesn't.

Following the fight, Brick Top's men burn Mickey's mothers' caravan to the ground and kill her. Mickey agrees to fight again for Turkish, and once again he refuses to go down when told to. As they leave the building, Mickey and his fellow gypsies shoot Brick Top and his men in retaliation for murdering Mickey's mother.

On going to the gypsy site, Turkish and Tommy discover that they have moved on, but they come across a dog who they take to the vets as it squeaks. In the dog they find a diamond.

Strand Two: A diamond heist goes wrong. A couple of underground characters have possession of the diamond but lose it as they are murdered. A hopeless band of three small time crooks own the dog who swallows the diamond from a bad boy Russian. The dog then runs away, next seen running around on the former gypsy site.

Quotable quotes (real)

Avi: "Shut up and sit down you big-balled f-word."

Brick Top: "[No sugar for me as] I'm sweet enough already."

What snack should I eat while watching this movie?

London Eastend roasted chestnuts with complementary single portion of salt. (Well, complimentary in that it doesn't tell you to 'f-word off'.)

Alternative casting suggestions

An all soccer players version (not just hardman Vinny Jones, who was one of the first players to combine the 'beautiful game' with Thai Boxing in England.)

If I were to watch this at home how best should I sit?

In the Gordon-Bennet pull-the-other-one-guv'nor any-ole-iron Pearly King position (sponsored by Lipton's tea).

Could this be made into a children's cartoon show?

Do not show to children who already try to do WWE(F) moves on their friends, as doing it the bare knuckle way could require expensive dental treatment.

If a character from this film were to be asked on Jerry Springer what would the subject of the show be?

My bare knuckled fighting friends: you are all as soft as the Pillsbury dough boy - bring it on.

Would your pets enjoy this movie? Would your dog like it? Other pets?

Dogs will love this movie, although could become distressed during the references to dog fighting if they are overweight.

Cats cannot see the point of bare knuckle fighting when you can bite, and therefore are liable to roll around on their backs for much of the time.

Small varmints are likely to hide in darkened corners.

How much would you pay for a copy of this movie in goods.

An Action Man doll with camouflage jacket.

Would this movie win awards for performances of the f-word?

Yes. A sturdy use of the word, well done.

Does the film attempt technobabble? If so does this succeed?

No, although there is a moment or two of gun comparison madness in which brands are exchanged offensively before one set of baddies make their escape.

Other comments

A sort of sequel to Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, but this time including bare knuckle underworld fighting - a popular subject.

A good movie to unwind to after a session of doing boy stuff.

Date of this review

May 7 , 2002

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