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Armageddon
Short plot summary

Much macho mayhem as oil riggers are sent into space to drill into an asteroid which is pinging its way towards earth. Their aim is to drill down into the rock, put explosives down the hole, and then blow it up before it hits us....

What our panel of critics thought

"This movie is a close encounter of the dumb kind."

"Did Independence Day use that same library footage of all those people all over the world looking up into the skies? I want my money back."

"How low can dumbed down movies go? Not this low surely?"

"It has always been my ambition to go into space to kill myself in order that the whole world could be saved. A triumph from Mr Willis who looks as if he is about to laugh outrageously as soon as the camera stops rolling."

"I know, I know. I am told that this is how football players bond. All I'm saying is - this isn't how the debating society did it."

"Lots of shouting. Even more grabbing each other and throwing each other whilst still shouting at them. I can't wait to get back to the relative sanity of the WWE ring."

"I'm off, please tell me how it ends. On second thoughts don't bother I need to pee for the next hour."

"Bruce, don't stay! Damn, that's a waste of a perfectly good A-List actor."

Please tell me the ending

The earth is saved - this leads to a hug fest throughout the world. (Then, soon after, we presume the suicide bombings start up again.)

The Bruce Willis character dies along with a few of the other more annoying characters. Don't fear kids: Ben Affleck lives on for the sequel.

Other comments
Run for the hills - this is a painfully testosterone fueled super dumb outing for all the family. Nothing makes any sense whatsoever.
Date of review

March 21, 2002

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