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Seven (Se7en)
Studio executives summary / pitch

Se7en deadly sins delightfully sculpted out of human flesh and, in one case, in a living death-like state. Something for all the family apart from the kids and the elderly and people with a phobia of the dark, knives, needles, open spaces, enclosed spaces and skin heads.

Short plot summary

A deranged murderer (or just an angry guy in a sick society? depends on your point of view) John Doe (Kevin Spacey) commits 7 horrific murders in the style of the seven deadly sins, but leaves the seventh one for 7 o'clock in horror postal delivery climax...

Horror investigation led by Detective Lt. William Somerset (Morgan Freeman) and Detective David Mills (Brad Pitt).

Rating
Adult: Contains moments of abject flesh striped horror, strong language, youthfully exuberant acting from Mr Pitt, reasonable arguments from be-caged psychotic.
What our panel of critics thought

"A horrible nightmare of nutty murders and then Mr Spacey makes it sound so reasonable at the end. Horror of horrors! Thankfully there is a happy brain explodey ending or I could not have slept for a week. A joy!"

"Gwyneth - there are few actresses who would have agreed to putting their heads in such a small box like that. Well done, your future career looks as bright and rosy as ever!"

"Nutty nuttiness throughout, but this time with a philosophical twist. Initially I felt like running, screaming, from the building, filled to the brim with horror, but, at the end, you know, I came round to John Doe's point of view. It was such a shame that that nice Mr Spacey had to be shot, he was acting so nicely up to that point."

"There is not enough nutty nuttiness in this movie. No bright orange (in clown costume) wig wearing in sight! A disappointment from start to finish."

"My dear, I have poor eyesight and, due to the darkness of this movie, I managed to see very little. I could hear the gun shots and swear words however. I must admit I did enjoy it, Brad Pitt's voice has been deepened to graveled levels of deepness. Bravisimo!"

"A superbly James Dean like performance from our Brad - thankfully he never gets to drive."

"The in-bathroom shaving scene has our Brad with his shirt on! A terrible missed opportunity for this young upcoming actor to strut his naked self for the delight of the viewing audience."

Please tell me the ending

John Doe turns himself in to police after a chase which almost kills David Mills (Doe has the gun to David's head but does not pull the trigger).

Doe has murdered six individuals as they represent six of the seven deadly sins (gluttony, greed, sloth, wrath, pride, lust). He kills Mill's wife (Tracy Mills - Gwyneth Paltrow) and says he killed her due to envy. He gets her head delivered in a box in the middle of nowhere at 7 o'clock...

Mills shoots Doe in the head.

Justify this movie's existence in the classic strand. From theVoiceof Reason.com's Veritable Cornucopia

An exemplary, dark, movie, which has been much copied.

It's that old senior cop about to retire and having to handle the young cop routine. It was presumably fresher when this movie came out (although Lethal Weapon fans probably complained). But, even so, the routine works well here, it is suitably cast and the combination is effective. Was Brad Pitt ever this young? Folks, here he is a pup's pup!

The plot sets out to shock and the first hour is truly grisly and seemingly pointless until the last hour in which we get to hear the voice of the murderer - an unexceptional man who is doing what he believes to be an exceptional thing. A man so upset by society's depravity that to get the attention of that society he decides not to 'tap it on its shoulder', but to 'take a sledge hammer to it'.

Quotable quotes (real)

"The Lord works in mysterious ways."

"If I shave off a nipple, could I put in a claim?"

If I were to watch this at home how best should I sit?

In the twilight of your own sanity whilst being licked by a favored pet.

Could this movie be improved with more lighting?

The problem with this movie is that it is very dull to look at. It is very bleak. Not seemingly since Blade Runner has it been nighttime so often.

A few more larva lamps would have help, and perhaps one of those nice multicolored wire lamps.

How philosophical is this movie?

This movie shows a totally deranged society with some of its worst types killed by an ordinary person society calls deranged Discuss, using cushions where appropriate.

Would your pets enjoy this movie?

Dogs will enjoy the mail delivery moment at the end, although, once they see what's in the box, may get a little peckish. Ensure there is enough meat in their bowl at all times.

Cats have all been taught the various murder methods by their Daddy cats, and have probably used most of the techniques against mice in the past, so the grisly scenes are pretty much passé to them now. Expect wistful sighs in remembrance of glorious times past throughout.

Sloth's may become agitated, believing them to be the next on the list.

Is there enough 'flapping about' in this movie?

It is a pretty hopeless situation at times for our heroes, but, thankfully, the movie is prevented from running longer than the generally accepted maximum of 2 hours by the fact that the evil baddy turns himself in, covered in blood and admitting everything.

How much would you pay for a copy of this movie in goods?

A 1970's noddy-head dog with a bandage over one ear.

Does this movie offer an effective philosophy for life?

Always try to be the best in life at everything you do.

Could you please lead us in a prayer of non-thanks to the devil for this movie?

Thank you, dear Beelzebub, for giving us this perfectly decayed cadaver of depravity.

In particular, we thank you for giving us John Doe, through which your evil machinations machinated. Doe, a man so gloriously nutty he kills for pleasure, and, yet, still has enough concern for his audience that he turns himself in half way through the movie (as nobody has time for a three hour movie these days and, frankly, the movie was starting to look like it was going to have to go on for that long considering how crap the cops were at tracking him down).

Uhm... Amen.

Other comments

Whilst the crimes committed are terrible, the relationship between Pitt and Freeman is engrossing and it is this which pulls us through. Not a pleasant movie to watch, although by this time in its history you have probably seen a couple of copy cat movies like this.

A good movie, and one that bares repeated viewings.

Date of Review

July 11 , 2003.

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