Three bored women (played by Cher, Susan Sarandon and Michelle Pfeiffer) call into existence (by means of witchcraft) the Devil - Daryl Van Horne (played by Jack Nicholson) - for their unwanton sexual gratification. It all ends badly.

"I believe that my penis is my antenna to God. When I speak with my old man firm and hard He gets a better reception. This isn't actually relevant here, but I just like telling people this."

"They never teach you how to defend yourself in an attack by feathers. Even Monty Python didn't do that one, did they?"

"I preyed to the God of large penises once, but he must have been out at the time."

"Oh, snoring in a church recital, Mr Nicholson! You have surely lived to be able to snore so convincingly."

"This movie is crap. It says to me, all women like men-bastards. That view is shit. All women are lesbians who are at varying stages of realizing that. Anyone who says anything else is deluded."

"The devil's man servant: wasn't that the ambassador in Men in Black 1? I want my money back."

"Get this heterosexual shit off my screen at once! It's perverted."

"Jack, I know you are only acting, but wash your mouth out with industrial strength soap and water all the same. You are only embarrassing yourself, young man."

"Oh I do love dancing in balloons, even though my first and second husbands died tragically doing so. However, given enough alcohol I can suppress those pain soaked memories to have a jolly good frolic. A triple whammy of joy!"

"This movie IS the devil - repent at length and with white lacy clothes on! How dare the writers make such an upstanding, wholesome, Christian woman look so silly from those devilish tricks? Scamper away you naughty devil, lest your naughtiness turns like a Frankenstein type monster to crunch your testicles in slow motion. (Behind you!)"

The conjured up devil is their ideal man. However, whilst he makes them zing with sexual fulfillment, he also causes the death of a local Christian do-gooder. Following this death (by way of violent cherry vomit), the witches want nothing more to do with Daryl and scheme to see him off.

He feels dejected by this attitude, and subjects the women to their worst fears. So they scheme back, to destroy him by seducing him, and then summoning their witchcraft to destroy him once and for all. (This they accomplish by sticking pins in a voodoo doll, and the innovative use of feathers and fire.)

Ending: 18 months on and the women have children, Daryl is last seen talking to his sons via a television set.

Ola! This movie made my Spanish blood warm remarkably! So much so that one was forced to argue passionately lest nobody heard a word I muttered. All this after I asked the Lord of Self Assertion to come hither (with His wisdom) so that one could let go a gobful of angry, and yet, well formed, words, without spitting (a difficult thing to do in Spanish!).

The idea behind this movie is such a wonderful gift from its writer, John Updike, although as one has never read the original novel one cannot be sure of this movies' honesty to its parent tome.

The first thing I noticed of this triumph of movie escapism, was what fine weather they enjoyed, even when the feathers flew with such gusto! And yet, some nasty rainy moments too helped us remember that the passions of our loins can change too, like the weather.

I have always liked Cher: I saw the video in which she had all of her body hair plucked, without anesthetic, 35 times. That was her best performance to date, but this comes a creditable second. A joy!

Passion fruit and ground up rhino horns.

[I'm just an] "average horny little devil."

In the in hospital traction position. Left leg suspended above your head.

I'm a horny little devil and I can have any woman I want. Slurp.

Black cats will particularly enjoy this movie for obvious reasons. White cats may find the plot a little too predictable.

Dogs will not like this movie as there are no sticks or trees of note.

Exotic fish will swim together in a pack to watch the movie in its entirety.

Your least favorite, coffee-stained, Cosmo.

Yes. If you need to offend someone who is prissy or frigid then this is the movie for you.

No. We are in a world of mystical mind games in the nether land, in a pre X-files world in which strange things happen for magically mystical reasons. The God fearing Christians come out of this movie pretty badly.

Make sure you have set yourself enough time to watch this movie as we find the ending goes on a bit longer than you might expect.

There has been criticism of the ending which some people find too violent. We have not read the book so don't really have a view, although we suspect some of the left over special effects from The Thing were used up in this production.