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Shakespeare in Love
Studio executives summary / pitch
Parody of the life of William Shakespeare, back in a time when his genius was not appreciated, as he suffers from writers block.
Short plot summary

Shakespeare (Joseph Fiennes) is a writer who has a block. He needs a muse. He finds one but is shocked to feel attracted to goatee wearing Viola (Gwyneth Paltrow) who he thinks is a boy (women are not allowed to be actors).

He discovers she is a girl, but then that she is promised to marry Earl Wessex (Colin Firth).

What our panel of critics thought

"A cheeky minx of a production. Was Mr Shakespeare really so thin and sexy?"

"A miscellany of Shakespearean witty delights."

"I am sure there are lots of literary jokes in this movie which I missed as I didn't stay awake often in those classes at school. A perfect love story, none the less, and I got some of the jokes too, I think."

"This movie has everything including a dog, a queen and beards."

"Celluloidal perfection."

"A love scene full of passion and lust, but thankfully none of the juices which never transfer well onto the big screen."

"Judi Dench as Queen Elizabeth I is magnificent."

"Oh, for the betting of £50, back in the days when that was a lot of money. Today that buys you just three hours in a top London Hotel (mind you, I have found that you can fit in an awful lot of toilet flushes and erotic splashy showers in that time.)"

"This was the first movie I saw Gwyneth Paltrow in. She has a very good English accent. It still seems funny to hear her speak in her usual American twang."

Please tell me the ending
She marries Earl Wessex. Sigh...
Justify this movie's existence in the classic strand from theVoiceofReason.com's Veritable Cornucopia

Bravisimo, another movie which has set out to demystify the Bard, this time by making him a vulnerable playwright with veritable quill trouble!

It is so tempting to start quoting Shakespeare, but at the risk of getting it wrong, just let me say that I found this movie wonderfully honest to its convictions. A consummate time piece peppered with literary quotes, sautéed in a delightfully passionate lusty sauce and delivered with a wit deserving of the Bard himself.

My dog died from exhaustion while I watched this movie and it was difficult to remember if I cried more for his passing, or this movie.

What snack should I eat while watching this movie?

A nice cup of tea English style (with crunchy biscuits, dunked to floppiness in the warm liquid).

If I were to watch this on video/DVD how best should I sit?

On a hard wooden seat or standing behind a tall person to get the full 'Rose' treatment.

We also recommend, for the authentic Shakespeare feel: take your home cinema system out into the open and watch from your upstairs window.

Is there enough licky love in this film?

Plenty! Bravisimo!! Thankfully, no slow motion to music attempts, but, still, clear, beautifully handled, nakedness, which is sufficient to consummate the gloriously lustful romance.

Would your cat like this movie? Would your dog like it? Other pets?

Dogs no longer care for Shakespeare as actors have stopped overacting when performing it. Get an old (black and white especially) version of any Shakespeare, delivered by pompous asses, and they will giggle and point delightedly.

Cats could enjoy the movie but may not, it depends on their evening meal, which should include fish or lamb for best results.

Rodents and vermin will ecstatically enjoy this movie. It will remind them of stories handed down from their ancestors who rummaged happily in the copious amounts of swill and offal in the streets at the time. Warning: Do not allow them into the bathroom as they are liable to make attempts to jump into the toilet and swim away (especially if someone has forgotten to flush).

How much would you pay for a copy of this movie in goods?

A one size fits all traditional Shakespearean era maids gown and hat.

Does the film attempt Shakespereobabble? If so does this succeed?

Unfortunately yes. We, as untrained Shakespeare lovers, had to research most of the jokes. We can now appreciate what an excellent movie this is, before that it was just a nice love story.

Other comments

A great, passionate, lustful, mainstream movie. All the players are perfectly cast and make the most of their roles.

If new to Shakespeare, this movie could induce a period of interest in his works. If so, try any of the Kenneth Branagh Shakespeare movies, they are all quite fine.

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