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Rocky
Studio executives summary / pitch
Useless-loser-dumb-muscle-head-slurry-speech-good-for-nothing, who can't even pour water into a beaker without spilling it, gets chance of a lifetime. He takes it, in America's land of punch-atunity.
Short plot summary

Apollo Creed (played by Carl Weathers) gives unknown Rocky the chance to fight for the World Heavyweight Championship. Rocky Balboa is played by Sylvester Stallone. This is a life enhancing movie of how an underachiever's luck can change in a lottery styling.

What our panel of critics thought

"This movie contains moments of raw egg eating horror - run for the toilet!"

"All the fun of waking up to go for a run at 4 am, coupled with the delicious blues and early morning lights of a modern city, but with none of the grunting and getting out-of-breath-ed-ness that activity usually implies."

"This movie is for anyone who has ever had a shot at the big time and gone for it. For everyone else, this is how it might have been..."

"Where are the Boxing accountants when you need them? If he's getting $150,000 for the fight how come he had to train with dead meat, quite literally folks, I'm-not-kiddenya?"

"To be quite honest, my dear, I thought Mr Stallone exhibited quite a big round flabby ass in those jogging pants."

Please tell me the ending or plot overview if necessary

Rocky loses on a split points decision after continual plot devices suggests he might, just might, with one more sweaty grunt, do it... Here's to Rocky 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9.... etc.

Justify this movie's existence in the classic strand from theVoiceofReason.com's Veritable Cornucopia

A consummate endeavor of young washed up punkdom pinging back off the veritable ropes of Boxy-underachievment. A triumph of winning life's lottery of punchtitude.

Whilst the whole premise of an unknown like Rocky being thrust into the spotlight is totally, completely, and utterly preposterous, once that concept is accepted it is a wonderful fable of self betterment, not exactly a case of grabbing at that dream, but one of trying not to bugger it all up once it has been so luckily presented to him.

OK he worked hard and it is all very nice for him, but essentially this movie is about a man who wins the lottery but goes jogging a lot more and all for a purse of $150,000, presumably a princely sum for a down beat low down back street guy who can't even talk proper.

My favorite bit was when he kept shouting "Aaa--ddd-rrr--iiii--aaaan"! A joy to the final bell.

Quotable quotes (real)
"Women weaken legs."
"Ad-r--i---an!"
What snack should I eat while watching this movie?

Raw meat, tenderized with your own fists.

Would your cat like this movie? Would your dog like it? Other pets?

DO NOT ALLOW YOUR DOG TO WATCH THIS MOVIE - there is one particular scene in which a dog is seen running with Balboa. But even if this scene was not in the movie, it would still not be recommended as it features long runs at 4 am in the morning. Hide the lead in a new place.

Cats are not boxing fans as it is a common recurring nightmare to them to have boxing gloves put on their paws. "If God gives you claws why not use them" is basically their line of thought.

Squirrels or any other jumpy/frolicky type animals may retrieve a store of their best nuts for this movie.

Other comments

A great movie, if a little gritty, and at least he doesn't win at the end which is a relief.

A painfully young Stallone gives a great performance. Every emotion is covered to budget and on time. Of course, this movie went on to spawn loads of sequels of basically the same story with a few twists, but at the time the movie struck a popular cord in the consciousness of a nation.

One of those inspirational go get em kid movies which spawned a whole industry. Don't avoid this movie, it is still an all time classic.

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