Overview
|
| Third
part of the classic novel by JRR Tolkein. Go here for our review of Fellowship
of the Ring, The Two Towers. |
Short plot
summary |
|
While Frodo
and Sam continue on their way to Mordor, The Great Battle
Of Our Time is about to kick off in Rohan. Gollum/Smeagol
tricks Frodo by sending him down a path where a big spider attacks... Will he
survive? Will the world end? OMG! There's only 1 and a half hours left... |
What our
panel of critics thought |
"Smeagol
is certainly my favourite in this movie. I am a bald man who has cultivated a
nice scrape-over of hair for my head - it keeps me warm in winter and gives my
pet birds something to play with when I sleep.""This
movie cured me of my arachnophobia in the severest way possible. (I never knew
you could choke so vigorously when you were scared!) I am now so confident that
I am over my phobia that I am going to a fancy dress party dressed as Little Miss
Muffet." "After
this movie all action movies are a footnote in the history books at best.""Who
would have thought a ring would have been that important?""Samwise
Gamgee the Brave? Who would have thought?""Oh
what a lovely ending, it made all of the head chopping offs and violent splayings
worthwhile, although I never did warm to those ruddy great big trees.""So,
using that World War Two analogy you keep wittering on about: who was Aragorn
supposed to be then? Roosevelt? Or Churchill? Talk about Hollywoodisation! Both
of those WW2 leaders were fat lardy pants! Nothing like the buff Aragorn at all,
although I do think I may have spotted a big cigar in his pocket one time... Hmmmm....
naughty me for looking so close!" |
Please
tell me the ending
|
Lord
Aragorn is crowned king. Frodo and Sam are saved and are reunited in a light-filled
dreamy-like bedroom. Frodo and Bilbo Baggins sail off into the sunset after emotional
parting. |
Justify
this movie's existence in the classic strand. From
theVoiceof Reason.com's Veritable Cornucopia |
|
A
maaaaaa-gnificent achievement. A truly awesomely enormously fantastically big
and yet, at the same time, a very politely small micro movie. Big in the sense
that there's a cast of millions in CGI terms, and small in that the emotion really
does sock you in the kisser at times, and especially in the final scenes. That
this movie is one of the most decorated of all movies in history is deserved,
although it might also be due to the fact that the awards nerds were compensating
for their hesitation in giving awards for the first two in the series, presumably
because they feared that the last one might be all 'mucked up' and make the awards
people look foolish... As
we know today, it wasn't mucked up at all (what is the opposite of mucked up anyway?
Well, that is the word for this movie.) This
movie truly lives up to expectations and any person who is disappointed by this
movie is probably hoping for too much in life. My
only quibble is that I never did quite buy into the fact that the Hobbits were
as small as they were supposed to be. I know they made great efforts to make them
look small compared to the horses etc, but the close ups just didn't work for
me. But that aside, everything is as close to perfect as cinema can be. |
Movie
trivia (real)
|
| IMDB |
If
I were to watch this at home how best should I worship?
|
| Sit
cross leggedly. Lift arms to the position of pointy hands in the air, then down
like a pigeon swooping for bread scattered by the hand of God. Close your eyes
skywards and shout Coooooooooo! Repeat until your arms go numb. |
Quotable quotes (CGI Battlefest special) |
|
"Aaaagghhhh!" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!" "A?" "Yyyyyeeeerrrggghhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
YAARRGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!" "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!?" "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOiiiiiiiOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" "NNNNNNOOOOOOOOO!
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" "PPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
IIIII NNNNNEEEEDDD TTTOOO PPPPPPPP" "Ssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhh-iiiiiiiiiiiii-tttttttttttttttt!" "Ffffffffffuuuuuuucccccckkkkkkkkk
eeennnn heeeelllllllllllllllll!" "Ouch
that hurt!" "Sorry
mate, didn't see you there." |
How enthused to take over the world did you feel after watching the trilogy? |
| Yes
, it was quite remarkable. I have applied to join my local fight club. |
Other comments
|
| Richly
awarded, highly praised, rightly so. A magnificent achievement and the CGI is
stunning, however we preferred the Two Towers for its emotion as we are a bit
girly like that. |
Date of review |
| January
20, 2005 |