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Short plot summary

Desert Shield to Desert Storm, from the perspective of Marine Anthony Swofford (Jake Gyllenhaal). A sort of drama doc with comedy, gritty reality and loads and loads and loads and loads and loads and loads of sand (including a sand vomit sequence).

What our panel of critics thought

"Did they bring out a Jarhead muscle workout tie-in dvd for this movie with a free Santa Claus hat with every purchase? If not it was a missed marketing opportunity is all I'm saying."

"What is a Jarhead? A Jarhead is a marine - because of the haircut and the fact that his head is an empty vessel."

"Why oh why oh why do they keep going on about their penises? Or should that be peni?"

"Male bonding has rarely been more sandy."

"Gallows humor done with a bomb."

"A blatant attempt to get a cool soundtrack album out of this movie: T-Rex 'Get it on' and Bobby McFerrins' 'Don't worry be happy.' Neither tune from the charts at the time."

"I do hope the animal rights people played hell with the scorpion fight. I boycotted this movie from that point (30 minutes in for those with a watch). A disgrace from nip to squish."

"So, the marine's allow masturbation? But isn't that technically gay sex?"

"A remarkably honest record of this time in history. I know this because I watched it all on television."

"I have never been to Kuwait, or been in the Marines, or actually ever been in a desert, but this seems very realistic to me. Excellent: 2 out of 10."

"Never has a Santa Claus hat been so well placed."

"So that's where 24's fictitious ex president of the United States David Palmer went? Pooping for freedom! Go gettem fella!"

Please tell me the ending or whole plot if necessary

Our heroes end up without a kill. (The incident in the sniper nest is the biggest disappointment in the movie, and is completely unbelievable.) On their return a Vietnam vet welcomes them home.

"This is my rifle. There are many like it but this one is mine. Without my rifle I am nothing. Without me my rifle is nothing. "
Other comments

Gyllenhaal plays it to perfection. Mostly completely believable. See also Three Kings.

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