Marlon Brando plays Mafia boss with penchant for cotton wool filled cheeks. Study of Italian-American family's survival in market economy.

"Takes Macho Gangster to a whole n'other level."

"The emphasis on family values is challenged by presence of horse's head."

"Is it a real horse in that bed? Could be. The father of all horse snuff movies. Perfect!"

"Never have there been more suits in a movie. The dry cleaning bill must have been enormous."

"Lots of wonderful shooting scenes, however, on closer look, some of these look like mini explosive charges choreographed by director for effect. This is unfortunate, no exploady heads! This would have made such scenes much more realistic (I refer you to the Zapruder film your Honor)."

"There must have been pressure on Coppola to use those wonderful 1970's fashions and hairstyles for this production. It could have added a whole new dimension to post war gangsterdom, a bit like The Monkees but without the humor and singing."

"If I had a dead horses head in bed with me I wouldn't just sit there kneeling and screaming I would have been outta there, had they glued him to the bed sheets too?"

"I found the horses head bit slightly unbelievable. Would anyone have slept through all that blood? I need an explanation."

"All these gangstas and no rap? Who's kiddin who here?"

"The first bitch slap I ever did see. By an Italian-American too, typical."

"The soundtrack is a veritable treasure trove of middle of the road munching music. I think my local Italian restaurant has the CD. After a few bottles of wine I will be singing along at full volume!"

"Only the briefest of Italian spoke and then subtitled. Personally I never trust subtitles they could be talking about anything..."

"...Then they start talking in Italian with no subtitles at all! Thank goodness I had a friend seven rows in front of me in the cinema to shout the translation back to me."

"The Christmas scenes could mean that this film will be a staple of Christmas television schedules for decades to come."

"Nobody bounces off a fender like Brando - the best example of fender bouncing in movie history - young actors take notes."

"Brando's death in the tomato patch was one of his worst screen deaths ever. Thankfully he drops to the ground mostly off screen with a tomato on his nose. I saw it coming all along."

"I don't want by brother coming out of that toilet with just his dick in his hand."

Chop suey or Chinese noodles and vegetables could cause problems. Best to stay with Lasagna or meat-fest style pepperoni pizza. This film is not for vegetarians.

Short of a nuclear one, unlikely.

The beautiful explosive end to Michael Corleone's wife was sheer TNT celluloidal perfection. Possible nit pick: Shouldn't she have had some L plates up if she was learning to drive?

Lots of small explosive charges to simulate gun shots. May date as special effects continue to improve.

The "dick in hand" comment uttered by Caan's character is a cracker, presumably gangsters often leave toilets with their dicks in their hands.

There is also a moment when Sonny goes to beat up the husband of his sister. (The guy is wearing an orange suit so probably deserves a good kicking.) The fight, however, is staged in the style of a professional wrestling match. The guy in orange clearly fakes a hit. You half expect Sonny to lift up a garbage can and hit him over the head with it before falling through a table.

James Caan is very hairy. Look for the scenes in which he wears a vest. This is the benchmark for hairy men in movie vestdom, never to be repeated in cinema history. Thankfully he does not sniff his fingers after scratching under his armpits.

Dangerously, at one point, it looks like Michael is going to have to fix a car. Whilst the car was only a Ford, references to carburetor could have qualified this film as technobabble. However, as his wife exits in a tasteful orangey ball of explosivity this is no longer a plot requirement. Phew.

Very watchable on various repeat viewings. Brando is quite good once you get used to the cotton wool in his cheeks which presumably is there to show he had been injured in the past. His demise in a tomato patch is very touching and unexpected.