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Evita
Studio executives summary / pitch
Life and musical (in-tune) death of Evita Peron, Argentinean icon.
Short plot summary

Madonna (Evita), Antonio Banderas (Che - journalist), Jonathan Pryce (Juan Peron) star in movie-isation of stage musical classic (which itself was a cheeky musicalisation of the life of troubled Argentinean ruling dictatorship.

Ordinary girl becomes national icon, but it all ends in tears.

What our panel of critics thought

"If all dictatorships are this musical, count me in."

"It had me kicking my heels up which annoyed visibly the old man sitting in front. But due to this stroppyness I don't feel guilty about pummeling his ass so."

"I saw this musical performed in London and the actress who played Evita was very short. There were whole scenes in which she could not be seen, all I saw was her hat going from side to side with the occasional jump."

"I was humming the soundtrack for the rest of the month. A stupendously musically literate event, almost worth the cost of a state funeral on its own."

"Just the right amount of dust - bravisimo."

"An English actor playing an Argentinian General, an American playing his Argentinian wife, and a Spanish national playing an Argentinian roughian? A triumph of avoiding to employ Argentinian's for the production (musical written by an English composer - Andrew Lloyd Webber)."

"A couple of moments of sexy saxophoney. No tanned tight and greasy bodied heaving though, a disappointment."

"A moment of towels-wrapped-around-the-waists-of-soldiers singing in the showers. How realistic is this? I have never taken a shower and not be slap butt assed naked. 0 out of 100 for realism. Deeply patronizing to assume this audience does not want, if faced with a shower scene, to see nakedness in all of its wobbly horror."

"My oh my. Have you ever seen an accapella version of this musical? It is a joy of banging of garbage cans and car roofs. You will never bang those clakkers in the same way again! I certainly haven't."

"Was that really Madonna lying there that still? A magnificent achievement by a notoriously dancy singer."

Please tell me the ending

Evita dies in tragic slow motion musical styling.

The life and times of Evita told in haunting pop melody.

Born as a penniless girl in the Argentinean dust back, Evita falls in love with Juan Peron and becomes his acceptable public face when he gets arrested. She is adopted by Argentinean public as their voice of reason.

Then she dies; fans go on to widespread rioting after unsuccessfully being urged not to cry...

Justify this movie's existence in the classic strand, by theVoiceofReason's Veritable Cornucopia

The director, Alan Parker, had many problems in the production of this masterpiece and he is to be congratulated for the result, if not for the financial bookkeeping.

In the end, the basics were always in place: A hit musical with a stream of superb pop riffs. All that was required was enough money to make it work. This it certainly looks like it had.

The hard won performances are very worthwhile. The lighting tremendous. The lavishness luscious. The fire both warm and threatening when appropriate.

Magnicifo! If this were a soccer match and it was a goal, the commentator would scream GOAL! for a whole fruity minute thirty.

If I were to watch this on video/DVD how best should I sit?

Ensure you have consumed at least half a bottle of wine, have enough light snacks within reach and a handful of pocket hankies for the inevitable bawlly-crying at the end.

Could this film be improved with more explosions/machine gun fire?

Yes. There is too much talking in places which could entertainingly be peppered with machine gun strafing at times.

Would your house pets like this movie?

Dogs could be overcome by the need to lick during this movie.

Expensive cats 'get' Madonna, cheaper ones do not and could get bored.

How much would you pay for a copy of this movie in goods.

A set of two fluffy dice for the car.

Would this movie win awards for performances of the f-word?

Sadly, another missed opportunity to take the f-word into the dimension of song.

Other comments

A pleasing version of the stage musical triumph. The songs are really fine and the performances acceptable. Banderas can sing, which is a relief.

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