Celebrity Funny Horoscopes
From the same web site that brings you monthly funny horoscopes... what the future has in store for you favorite celebs... Exclusively vague, guaranteed for life...
 
Celebrity Horoscope for... Britney Spears (December 2, 1981)
Britney Spears{Picture}
Sagittarius: Born Kentwood, Louisiana.

You use hats to disguise your emotional needs, yet your emotional needs are stronger because your head is covered from the beneficial influences of the planets... go figure... It's one of those annoying astrology thingies which you'll have to work through... Ask your analyst for advice, all we can suggest is more iron in your diet.

It is possible that you don't have much past life experience as a human, perhaps you were a potato or even a cabbage in an earlier incarnation. In that case, as you age and mature you will become more sensitive to the troubles in the world, especially for the feelings of stews.

You tend to be active, dynamic, nubile and assertive, especially during choreography. You know that you're special and enjoy a charmed life. Intuition is your favorite feeling after warm baths.

You are both competitive and flamboyant. You give people a strong and immediate impression of who you are. Timid and slow folk may find you overwhelming, rash and willful and will struggle to keep up in dance routines.

TIP: Pouting has been good to you but don't expect this to last into your 30's.

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