May 28, 2009
The home of world comedy spoof entertainment +++ Hypnotragedy

Twitter Mass Hypnosis Attempt Hypnotizes Many

"I clucked uncontrollably for three hours", says one

Dr Seth Mysterious, the world renowned stage hypnotist, who goes under the name HypnotistBob on Twitter, attempted to put thousands of his followers under his spell on the micro blogging site this Tuesday.

Police say they have so far received over 150 complaints from family and friends of people who were told to cluck and gobble like a chicken on the popular micro blogging site.

A spokesman for Stage Hypnotism Inc, told this website:

"Dr Mysterious gave clear instructions to Twitterers that they should cluck and gobble like a chicken for no longer than 30 minutes. Nothing could possibly go wrong, but in the unlikely event those affected continue to make these noises after this time, give them grain and allow them to sleep outside and it will eventually wear off. And in the meantime whatever you do don't show them a picture of a cock."

A reader recorded the incident that we publish below.

The transcript clearly shows the incident unfolding, with Twitterers talking happily about snacks they were eating when the incident occurred...

HypnotistBobs' postings are highlighted for your reading convenience.

HildaSteen Munching some cheese and onion chips. Deee-lish!
JayLeno Chili Doritos here! Nice and crispy! Mmmmh!

HarrySmith Drinking a nice cup of tea and eating a cookie. Yummy Yum Yum!!! Life is good

JennyJens eating a chocolate bar and thinking of making a cup of coffee, here
HypnotistBob You are all feeling very sleepy
LarryKing Chocolate cup cake for me! Hmmmmm!
JayLeno How many chips can you put in your mouth at one time without breaking any? I can put 55.
HildaSteen I can put a whole packet in mine at once. How many chips is that? About a thousand?
HypnotistBob When I type 'click' three times you will all close your eyes and be under my power! Ha ha Haarrgh...
JohnLeno Had enough chips now, fancy something sweet and creamy, any ideas?
HypnotistBob Click!
HildaSteen If you crunch the chips you've put in your mouth does that mean you increase the number of chips? So, say you had 40 chips in your mouth, after crunching once you would have probably 80. I don't really want to take them out to count them they feel all slimy is that normal?
HypnotistBob Click!
HarrySmith Just finished a nice budgerigar, the tweeting was really starting to annoy me. Yummy! Does anyone else hear a clicking sound?
JennyJens I'm feeling sleepy. Anyone else feeling sleepy?
HypnotistBob Click
HildaSteen No not sleepy. No. Still hungry.
HypnotistBob Click
HildaSteen I am under your power oh master.
JennyJens What is it that you want oh master?
HypnotistBob I want you all to talk in the language of the gobbly chicken. When I type click once more you will all gobble hilariously for 30 minutes.
JimmyJones Helloo! Just got off work, what's going on ere then?
HypnotistBob Click!
JennyJens Gobble gobble gobble
HildaSteen Gobble gobble
JohnLeno Gobble oink, gobble oink oink
JimmyJones why is everyone talking like a hypnotized chicken? What have I missed?
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