Jan 12, 2009
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'La Toya Jackson, Michael Jackson Are The Same Person' Conspiracy Latest

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Breaking shock horror: A popular conspiracy, dating back to the pre-Internet era, claims that Michael Jackson and La Toya Jackson are the same person.

The two, it is claimed, have never been seen together.

Now could be our only chance to see if there is any truth to this conspiracy theory as La Toya is currently being held captive in the UK's Celebrity Big Brother house, along with other celebrities including Verne 'Mini Me' Troyer and rap star Coolio.

Michael Jackson
La Toya Jackson

Ever since La Toya entered the Big Brother house in London a week ago, our paparazzi have been camping outside Michael Jackson's Dubai residence in an attempt to take a picture of him.

But, shockingly, after one whole week of camping out poised with our cameras to take a picture, we have not seen Michael, heard him sing any of his hits or seen anyone entering or leaving with a veil over their face.

Our expert in conspiracy, Dr Smugsmith, told us yesterday:

"I am surprised that we haven't seen Michael over the last week. This could mean nothing, or it could mean everything. On a balance of probabilities, and not wishing to rush to a conclusion, I would speculate that this is damning evidence that Michael Jackson and La Toya Jackson are indeed one and the same person. Although if Michael is seen whilst La Toya is still in the Big Brother house then I reserve the right to change my opinion. Once La Toya is out of the house all bets are off."

Lets go 'live text' to our reporter hidden outside Michael Jackson's house:

"Hello, you join me here as I wait for Michael Jackson. I have been here for a whole week now, and I have yet to see him, any of his entourage or even anyone wearing a veil over his face. I will update this text if I see anything."

Now we cross 'live text' to outside the Celebrity Big Brother house in London:

"Hello, you join me here as I wait outside the Big Brother compound here in east London. La Toya is still in the house, I repeat La Toya is still in the house."

More may follow.


PLEASE NOTE: THIS STORY IS A SPOOF. It was written to parody the media's attitude to the Jackson's.

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