Sept 7, 2008
The home of world comedy spoof entertainment +++ US Erection 2008

VOR: US Election 2008 - What Happens If They Don't Accept The Nomination?

Sarah Scuffle

Mission accomplished! Hurrah! Yes! Whooo! Yip, yippeee yip yip hip hooray!

In both the Democrat and Republican conferences held to select the nomination to run for US president, both candidates actually accepted it. Result.

But what would happen if the candidate walked up to the lectern and said, "Thanks, appreciate it, I really do, but I can't accept?"

Our panel of experts in everything other than politics and American constitutional law give us their views.

Harry Meedsden, Circus Artist

"The crowd would go silent and then the music would play and the candidate would walk off waving to the crowd and everyone in the crowd would look at each other and shrug their shoulders and say "What are we supposed to do now?" And then everyone would go and get a cup of coffee and probably a donut or one of the those large cookies with chocolate chips in. Oh the queues!"

Jerry Sprinkler, Radio Talk Show Host

"Women would scream like in a horror movie made in the 1950's, men would shout "No! Let me att'em, Chuck", children would look at their parents in a 'oh you're so gonna pay for this waste of my time you retard' kind of way, and the media would cancel all television shows for the rest of the week so that they can discuss what happens next with flashy graphics calling this something like the worst constitutional crisis since a Hollywood actor was selected as Republican candidate."

Hug Tharsden, Bodybuilder

"The crowd would scream and shout as if the candidate had just said 'I accept the nomination' and then they would continue screaming and shouting while he turned and walked back, waving to the crowd as he went. Then there would be a period in which the crowd continues shouting and screaming with no candidate on the stage and then the lights would go up and everybody would go home."

Gramps Rusky, Organic Farmer

"There would be absolute pandemonium. Young men would punch old women and children would punch animals. Mules would punch horses and sheep and pigs would fight to the death. No, I think on balance it is only polite for the candidate to accept once everybody has gone to so much trouble."

Harry Baldicoot, Retired retirement consultant

"In the good old days all the candidates looked the same so if one of them pulled out you would hardly notice the change. Damn and tarnation to modern politics!"



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