Just
when it looked like Charlton Heston's death couldn't get
any worse, it got even worse last night.
After
three days trying, directors in charge of the Charlton Heston
funeral have revealed that they have been unable to remove
the gun from his cold dead hands.
A
spokesman for the funeral home told this website:
"We
have tried everything but he just won't let go.
We
have been unable to get instructions from his family on
how to proceed, we could of course break some fingers,
but that really is a last resort.
We
have tried warming his hands up a bit but no joy, someone
in the office suggested we tried vinegar but that just
made him smell funny.
Even
in death he's an extraordinarily strong man."
Heston
famously claimed at an NRA meeting that they would
have to take the gun from his cold dead hands, however at
the time he said that few realized that in death this would
prove much more difficult than he seemed to imply.
An
expert in guns stuck in hands told this website:
"If
the worst comes to the worst then he should be buried
with the gun. It's probably how he would have wanted to
go."
One
American died.
In
other news:
The
National Rifle Association has declared Monday 14th April
2008 as a day of mourning for Charlton Heston with a one
minute tribute of random shooting at 11am.
