The
International Monetary Fund has upgraded George Clooney's
'gorgeousness' for the next 4 years to over 2% growth pa,
the highest number ever seen in history.
Sally
Bushington, Junior Analyst at the IMF, told reporters:
"Clooney
swoon is set to hold up well during these troubled mildly
recessionary times."
Experts
predict that George Clooney will
become more gorgeous than every other man in the world combined
if his swoon factor continues to grow at its current rate,
by 2015.
But
critics of Clooney are not impressed: "The boom of
swoon could lead to a nasty crash in the early years of
the next decade if his gorgeousness isn't curbed now,"
said Harry Swoonfellows of the Institute of Animal Husbandry.
"We are calling for fewer manicures, worse haircuts
and less shaving now to help curb the inevitable swoon crisis
later."
But
how Clooney could possibly be less gorgeous leaves women,
some as old as 96, bewildered, as the following vox pop
in the streets showed:
"I've
been a fan of Clooney since Roseanne when he was just
a spindly youth," said a fattish, brightly colored
bloused woman.
"Clooney
swoon is here to stay," according to a slim big-haired
woman with large glasses.
"He's
the modern day Cary Grant and everyone knows he
was a leading man well into his 90's," said a woman
in a wheelchair.
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In
other related news:
Female
interviewers in London have been offered counseling after
meeting George Clooney, who is currently promoting his movie
Leatherheads.
