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Aug 1, 2007
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Rupert Murdoch Takes Over The Wall Street Journal, His Empire Celebrates

Sycophantic Soiree

As we receive news that the Rupert Murdoch controlled News Corporation has just taken over the publishers of the Wall Street Journal, Dow Jones & Co, we report on the likely responses from Murdoch owned news vendors from around the world:

The Times (of London) "A mesmerisingly remarkable move from a great newspaper owner. Murdoch is simply amazing, yet again."

New York Post "Bam Kebam! Godlike Murdoch Seals Journal In Dramatic Coup!!!"

The Sun "Pure brilliance from a remarkable newspaper magnate. That's wot The Sun thinks!"

The Australian "Hey, Sheila, put another prawn on the barby for the Wall Street Journal! Rupe's been gettin' 'em in again!"

Fox News "Even though you might expect me to say that Rupert Murdoch is brilliant just because he owns this channel and pays my salary, why shouldn't I say he's brilliant when I think that he is? again? It's your right to disagree with me, but Rupert Murdoch is, at least to me, and all of my colleagues here, a Godlike figure. His recent move on the Dow Jones Company is simply another breathtaking achievement by this most remarkable person. If my critics criticize me for telling the truth here then so be it, I report it like it is, no apologies."

The Sunday Times (of London) "Even though, normally, nobody does anything here until Saturday, we feel it is only just and proper that we express that everyone here at The Sunday Times (of London) is simply amazed at yet another amazing achievement from this most remarkable of..."

Wall Street Journal "Welcome Rupert Murdoch! A hearty welcome from everyone here at the Journal. It is quite simply remarkable that you now own us. Fantastic. Brilliant. Whoopee! Champers anyone?"

New York Post (Business page): "Rupe, You Old Dog. You Done Good!"

MySpace.com "Is there nothing that Rupert Murdoch can't buy? Fantastic!"

JumpTheShark.com "Even at 76 years of age Rupert Murdoch is going strong... No jump registered yet..."

 

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