Feng
Shui, the belief that arranging a building or a room in
a certain way gives a positive vibe to the place*, has been
exposed as a fraud in testimony given to this web paper
by an anonymous expert in the field. This expert told us
that some countries are simply the wrong shape for it to
ever work properly.
These
revelations followed a disastrous Feng Shui makeover on
a New Zealand home makeover show which lead to a series
of unexplained deaths and wallpaper stains.
The
house, in the south of Auckland, was 'rejiggled' by Feng
Shui guru's Mel Helmott and Sheena Migburry, and, following
their makeover, nothing worked properly, including the toaster.
A
consulting Feng Shuist told this web site that it was probably
due to the mountains which would 'bounce stuff of it'. Local
mountaineer Geb Bush (no relation to the US president's
brother) said that the mountains were big and rocky in these
parts and if they 'buggered up' the Feng Shui he wouldn't
be surprised.
After
making inquires before publication of this expose*, we have
discovered that this is a much more widespread problem,
and not restricted to New Zealand at all.
We
have discovered that Feng Shui may be broken in at least
another 3 other countries.
Readers
have told us that Feng Shui in Norway is close to useless
because of the Fjords and crinkly coastline, with over five
readers complaining that their televisions didn't work after
being Feng Shuified.
Mavis
Pumpernickel, a reader in Amsterdam, wrote in to complain
that when it is stormy her Feng Shui laid out study becomes
a death trap and she fears to use her stapler or letter
opener.
If
you have any Feng Shui experiences please contact us at
editor@theVoiceofReason.com.
*
Disclaimer: theVoiceofReason.com and all of its associates,
writers and/or advertisers know nothing about Feng Shui,
how it is spelt, pronounced, or what actually it is. Any
inference that this is the case from this article should
not be taken. theVoiceofReason.com has a very busy schedule
and it is sometimes not possible for time constraints reasons
to research any story even a little bit, but mostly at all.
We do hope this does not spoil your enjoyment of this article,
and that you will keep on coming back for more informative
stuff from this web site.
