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What Would 1980's Joan Rivers Say About Joan Rivers' Jewelry Collection Today?
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Gold Encrusted Debate
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The
first we ever heard of Joan Rivers in the 1980's, she was
ripping into celebs with no mercy... Something about burying
Karen Carpenter in pleats, if memory serves (Karen Carpenter
died of Anorexia). So, imagine our surprise when we saw
Joan Rivers on QVC selling her own line of jewelry?
We
wanted to know:
Is
Joan Rivers a senile bitch, or business genius?
Our
panel of experts give us their views... (Below is a cheesy
quote from her website joanrivers.com.)
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"All
women deserve beautiful jewelry
My
dream was to create a line of
affordable,
classic pieces for today's
woman, timeless jewelry that doesn't go out of style.
The Joan Rivers Classic Collection
is that dream come true."
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"Joan
of the Jungle" Leopard Bee Pin
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"Joan
Rivers is one of the most respected comediennes in
the history of stand up. How dare you call the woman
a 'senile bitch'. She clearly has completely sold
out, but that is a sign of incredible business acumen
in my opinion. Well done Joan, I'll have a Diamond
Encrusted Napkin Ring for my nose, pronto!"
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"Joan
says on her website that she wanted to design jewelry
that 'doesn't go out of fashion'. Doesn't it have
to be in fashion in the first place for that
sentence to be true? Personally
I think if Joan can sell this stuff with a straight
face, we only have the Botox to thank."
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"Joan
must be well into her 70's but still she has the
skin of a 30 year old. Bravisimo Joan, and I'll
have a Gold Encrusted Thimble Holder please!
PS: I do hope the jewelry comes with that lovely
crusty old person smell too!"
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"Oh
for fuksakes, Britney should be doing this, not some
old would be crinkly but has a fantastic plastic surgeon
comedienne! I would just love to see the bitch with
her scalpel putting those jewels in, or is it all
made in a factory in China?"
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"I
bought Joan's Classic Golden Apple And Carrot Tie
Pin, and I must say I have never been happier.
It certainly made this girl feel like a million dollars!
I wonder if Joan Rivers has a spare million dollars
to give me? Bet she does, selling this crap..."
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"I
bought a Joan Rivers charm bracelet and earring set
for my ex-girlfriend. You should have seen her face!
I for one didn't see the punch coming and when I regained
consciousness my head was down the toilet!"
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