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Dead
Ken
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The
apparently dead fraudster, Ken Lay, should not be let out
of the sight of law enforcement officers for at least three
weeks because he could be 'pretending to be dead'
- that is according to the management consultants we have
been speaking to.
Our
investigations have discovered that Enron executives were
all trained in the ancient art of feigning heart attacks,
a procedure originally given to negotiators looking for
a quick escape out of tense or dangerous negotiations in
hostile foreign countries.
In
July 1998 three executives from Enron all seemed to suffer
from heart attacks simultaneously during a meeting with
ministers from the Nigerian government. In fact they all
employed the Heart Attack Method of Escape. They
were immediately rushed out of the negotiating room and
into an ambulance, which was then diverted directly to the
airport. Nobody died.
Those
trained in the management Heart Attack Method of Escape
are trained to reduce their heart beat to zero and brain
activity to nothing for up to two hours at a time, enough
time to convince most people that the manager is actually
dead.
