April 18, 2006
The home of world comedy spoof entertainment +++ Tom and Katie Having A Baby

Should Tom Cruise Be Allowed To Eat His Own Baby's Placenta?

What do you think?

Reports in the press suggest that, on top of making sure the baby he is having with Katie Holmes is delivered in complete silence (allegedly), Tom Cruise is to eat his baby's placenta (allegedly again).

Should this be allowed?

Our commentators give us their views

"Mmmmmh! Pla-cen-ta..."
"My friend told me that eating the placenta is a bit like chewing on someone elses dried up, really brown, 10-day-old chewing gum which has been warmed up slightly. Both tasteless and yucky at the same time..."

"Oh, eating the placenta, that old chestnut! The decision one has to make is "shall one dine on the placenta with a knife and fork or go al fresco?" Knife and fork has a few good things going for it, because one can scrape off some of the blood, faeces and giblets, however there is nothing like a nice munch of placenta, lifted to your mouth with your very own fingers! A nice Chianti is also advisable, actually about 8 bottles of the stuff should do the trick. Hic!"

"I saw a chef on a television show fry up the placenta with onions and serve it up to 10 guests, including the mother and father, once. It's one of the rare times on a television cooking show when I would have grabbed my throat and made a gagging sound if they forced me to try it for the cameras."
"Have you ever tried eating the placenta? It's so chewy-tough! When TC says he wants to 'eat the placenta' he invariably means he wants to have a little nibble at it. I doubt he would be taking a big huge bite into it like you would into, say, a hot-dog or something. If he does that then that is real news: TOM CRUISE CHOKES ON BABY'S PLACENTA. I'd even be prepared to buy a newspaper with that story in it, especially if there is a picture of the blood dripping out of his mouth..."
"I do hope he is going to lick the baby clean with his own mouth too, delicious!"
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