A
man with a white beard is helping terror police with their inquiries following
evidence obtained from an informant being held at Guantanamo Bay, we have learnt.
The
informant, who, according to a spokesman, had not been tortured, but may have
been routinely 'minced pied', 'turkey stuffed', 'vigorously tossed
before being flambéed with brandy' and then 'Kajagoogooed',
had claimed that the man was planning to break into homes across the world on
Christmas Eve.
A
spokesman from the USA's Department of Homeland Security was unavailable for comment
when we called last night because he 'was busy at the office party'.
A
photocopy of his arse is now on the website.
For
other torture euphemisms click here.
Merry
Christmas to you, and any innocent people there may be being held without trial
in Guantanamo Bay this Christmas. |
