Nov 23, 2005
The home of world comedy spoof entertainment +++ Holiday Season Crisis

Department Store 'Mannequin Rape' Hits All Time High

Shocking Figures

The period beginning on the Monday before Thanksgiving* up until Christmas, is the peak time for a little reported incidence of mannequin rape, according to disturbing figures that have come into our possession.

Female mannequinThe attacks, where store mannequins are sexually assaulted, sometimes in the store in front of other shoppers, hit a peak in 2004 with over 4,000 suspected incidents. That number is expected to grow again this year.

The combination of mild winters, and increasingly sexy mannequins are to blame for the increase in what is widely regarded as a significantly underreported crime.

Mannequin rape may have gone unnoticed for many years as it had been miss-reported under other offenses, such as 'mannequin theft', 'temporarily missing mannequin' or 'unauthorized mannequin moving'.

Male mannequinIn the case of 'mannequin moving', most stores do not regard it as a police reportable offense if the mannequin is moved less than 3 inches.

A store security guard told this web site:

"85% of mannequin rapes occur when a mannequin, which is on display near a changing room, is taken into the said changing room and then attacked."

23 November 2005

*Thanksgiving is the fourth Thursday of November.

Related Articles
For our latest stories click here
Don't stop searching for the truth. You certainly won't find it here.
"The home of truth entertainment", "The truth is in here" and "Uniting the world through sarcasm"(c) TM. World rights reserved. This is a comedy site with 100% original material. All stories are made up.
We also run a site specifically for the UK/Europe at
Do you have a comment? Help us improve:
When only cynicsm will do